Curing a Relationship Sample Essay

Curing a Relationship Sample Essay.

Curing a Relationship Sample Essay

Category: Others

. Write the discussion #8A – Rough Draft Body 1 Summary, and 8B – Building an argument

I have two discussions for the book the relationship cure the author John Gottman

I provide the link for this book The Relationship Cure – A 5 Step Guide to… [PDF] and read two chapters

actually, i made mistake to post all the document in same structure, just choose the last one is more clear.

just i want to tell you when you choose the quote write the page please and he wants to explain the quote in your own word

Discussion #8A – Rough Draft Body 1 Summary

Student’s Name




Discussion #8A – Rough Draft Body 1 Summary

Part A: Use a transition + Write the topic sentence for your summary paragraph.

 In his book, John Gottman, The Relationship Cure, he discusses three key steps in achieving a better relationship by focusing emotional command system, evaluating its heritage, and improving the individual’s communication skills.

Part B: Briefly discuss major ideas in the three chapters

 Discovering an individual brain’s emotional command system is key in ensuring that an individual has a healthy relationship with himself and others.

The individual’s brain command system grows when a person makes proper decisions, which require evaluations by understanding the individual preferences and needs.

The human beings’ command system is not any different, and however, the only difference is due to the different experiences people have in their lives.

Additionally, chapter five is a detailed evaluation of the individual’s emotional heritage, which refers to their past experiences and their impact on the individual relation.

There are families of philosophies that guide the individual emotions that focus on the different approaches to issues, such as the emotion coaching philosophy emotion-dismissing and emotion-disapproving philosophy.

Besides, emotional vulnerability is clear in this chapter, whereby vulnerability involves two people, the vulnerable person and the listening partner.

Part C: Write a concluding sentence that uses a  simple transition like in the conclusion and then re-states the thesis but in different words.

In summary, relationship cure involves mind preparedness, evaluating the emotions, and opening up to a listening person by using communication skills to ensure vulnerability.

Part 1 A: Review the Argument Essay Lecture.

In chapter 4, what is one idea that Gottman claims is true – this is his argument.

Gottman’s idea:  discovering individual Brain’s Emotional Command System

Context + quote to support that idea:

For people to take control of their emotional relationships they should understand the command system and how it operates. “Each     one      coordinates      the emotional, behavioral,       and      physical            responses         needed for       certain functions related         to Survival” (Gottman p 119).

In chapter 5, what is one idea that Gottman claims is true – this is his argument.

Gottman’s idea: evaluating the individual’s emotional heritage.

Context + quote to support that idea:

Gottman emphasizes the relevance of evaluating individual’s emotional pat experiences and how they may influence their future relationships with others.  “It       affects your     awareness        of         your     own            emotions,         how     you      express them, and       how     you      bid       for       connection (Gottman p 176).”

Part 1B: Now, what might be the counterargument? Why might someone disagree with Gottman?

In chapter 4, how might someone disagree with Gottman’s idea above? This is a counterargument.

Counter Argument:

Some people have an emotional imbalance, which may affect the functioning of the brain’s command system leading to difficulty in understanding the emotional command system.

Context + quote to support Counter Argument:

Regardless of the individual’s perspective on issues and ideas, every individual has a command system that controls their relations. Therefore, regardless of the individual’s emotional state, they all have a command system that they need to evaluate and understand.  “So         one      part      of examining   your     emotional command systems       is          to         learn    more    about   your relationship         with yourself” (Gottman p 120).

 In chapter 5, how might someone disagree with Gottman’s idea above? This is a counterargument.

Counter Argument: people have the power to make changes in their emotional responses by moving on from their past.

Context + quote to support Counter Argument:

            People can dismiss their experience and focus on leading new lives. By emotional heritage,”        I            mean    the       way     we       were treated    in the past,       and the way     such     treatment         made            us         feel.     It includes the way the people close to           us         acted   when   they     were angry, sad, happy,      or fearful—what they said,     what    they     didn’t  say” (Gottman 175).

Part 1 C. Finally, how would Gottman respond or rebut what others might say?

In chapter 4, how might Gottman respond to the counterargument above to say it is wrong or that he is right? This is a rebuttal.

Rebuttal: Every person has a command system that influences their relationships.

Context + quote to support rebuttal:

Regardless of their emotional state, people tend to take control of their interactions with others regardless of a positive or negative approach. “According    to this theory, people  differ   in         how     much they     like to have     these systems stimulated. Identifying your     own optimal    level     of stimulation  is important for emotional well-being.   First,    it          can help           you to  find     roles with which            you’re most     comfortable     and most          likely to           succeed” (Gottman 119).

In chapter 5, how might Gottman respond to the counterargument above to say it is wrong or that he is right? This is a rebuttal.


The fact that therapists encourage people to forget the past does not mean that their lives are completely detached from those experiences.  Therapists are likely to encourage people to make positive changes in their lives; however, it does not mean the past impacts their current lives. The only difference is that they try to lead life differently without paying much attention to the experiences.

 Context + quote to support rebuttal:

You can use memory and imagination to recall times in the past when you were hurt, angry, or heartbroken. You can sense the feelings you were experiencing at the time. You will not be able to remove the pain completely—at least not at first—but you might get fresh insights. “Such       insights            can       help            you      to         feel

Differently      about   similar  situations         and      relationships    in         the       future” (Gottman 179).


Gottman. J, (2002). The Relationship Cure. A Five-Step Guide to Strengthening Your Marriage, Family, and friendships.  Harmony Books, New York.

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